Im looking for examples of stupidity.

[jimjam]

Okay, Im trying to put a little something together and Im looking for anecdotes stories etc about stupid people doing stupid things - preferably rural and irish.

One example of the type of thing Im looking for would be a neighbour of mine growing up who used to trap crows, spray them pink and release them. Pretty cruel and no doubt probably fatal to the bird but maybe you see what Im looking for. The weirder the better.

Thanks in advance if anyone posts anything.

[tinkerhil]

No helmet
Sorry James
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTIEHzHSdxU

[spark]

Lady walks up to mobile shop and asks...."how much are your 10p crisps.?"

[tankslapper]

http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2006.html

[chris_the_sham]

the birth of pete?

[andyh]

Two I can think of this weekend.

1. c.2000 queueing to get in a shop at Junction 1 last weekend.
2. People fighting in the Q over Q jumping.

Oh and another:-

Cival Servants who have forgotten who they work for !

[PBR_Streetgang]

Lady walks up to mobile shop and asks...."how much are your 10p crisps.?"

didn't she realize they only sold phones?

[spark]

didn't she realize they only sold phones?

haha i hope you are joking..! it was mobile in the type that you drive around not as in mobile phones and was about 20 years ago long before mobile phones:eek:

[roverspeed]

I locked my car keys in my car boot on sunday and don't have a spare set.

I had to smash my passenger window to get in the car.

Thats pretty stupid :D

On the up point though, i found out my car has an alarm, which i didn't know before................Every cloud :)

PS JimJam, when i first read your post i was half asleep and thought you friend trap COWS and sprayed them pink LMAO!

[ThOnda]

I paid to see in cinema what I could have seen at home for free on TV...

Spider pig, spider pig... :D

[kenny]

I locked my car keys in my car boot on sunday and don't have a spare set.

I had to smash my passenger window to get in the car.



On the subject of keys, reminds me of this story.
Don't' beleive I'm telling this story, it's stupid, my stupidity...
MTBing in Castlewellan on a cold (very cold this becomes important later on) but clear winter morning, just after I got the new motor about 3-4 months, got back to the car (had parked outside the main gate in the town) changed into clothes, went to go home, but no sign of my keys.

Threw everything out of my mates van where I had changed, still no sign of them. The last place I remembered putting them was on the ground as I loaded bike onto car, I definetley had them as I opened car when I got back to it. Thought some local scum had stealthily sneaked up, lifted the keys. Or some do gooder had lifted them thinking they were lost, and some mtb'ing hoods would have lifted them. Sent mate round to police station in Castlewellan in case someone had handed them in, it was closed.

So no sign of keys, called recovery service (took about an hour to arrive) to leave me home and then try and break into my own house to get spare set. But was passing my sisters house, so got recovery to drop me off there. Went for a shower, and took my shoes off.....I hear a jingle.

Keys were in my shoe all along. I could feel my foot was sore, but it had become numb from the cold and I just assumed that it was painful from the cold, not from a bunch of keys (a large car key, 2 yale style keys and a small torch) jammed in my shoe for about 2 hours :o

All characters are purely fictional and any similarity to real life is purely coincedental...I wish. At least I saved on the petrol on the way home.

[baz]

Funny story involving relative stupidity. I heard it 3rd or 4th hand so it is, of course, entirely true.

A very good friend of mine worked in an architecture practice in Belfast. Generally, it was crap, but the Christmas do's were always pretty legendary, mainly because the boss would let his hair down and tell a few stories of the adventures he got up to. One example my friend told me always stuck in my mind. Let's call it "The story of why you shouldn't drink and drive".

My friend's boss, let's call him John, was attending a Christmas do of another company, owned by a friend of his, Fred. It was a rural practice, and so the do was in a country pub. To be honest, it was just a jolly for Fred and his mates, and he felt obliged to invite the staff. Anyway, Fred got hammered and towards the end of the night, was in no shape to drive home. However, he couldn't be dissuaded from trying. John, being a helpful sort, and at least slightly less hammered, decided to travel with him in the passenger seat to try to keep him awake and on the road.

So they headed off, driving very slowly down the country lanes on the way to Fred's house. John kept chatting to him to stop him falling asleep, telling him to drive very slowly, and throwing in the odd steering correction, just to help out.

Anyway, they took what seemed like ages to get anywhere as they're driving so slowly. John was struggling to stay awake, but realised that he needed to keep chatting to this guy to make sure he didn't drift off. Despite his best efforts, John eventually fell asleep, momentarily, and woke up when he felt a bit of a bump in the road. He turned around to ask his friend what it was, only to see that his friend was gone, and he was completely alone in the car, which was, by this stage, still slowly making it's way down the road.

John stopped the car, got out and saw Fred lying a few yards up the road screaming about a sore leg. It turns out that Fred, in his drunken stupor, hadn't closed the door properly, and he had been leaning on it while driving. It opened, he fell out, the car slowly rolled over his leg and broke it, and the door bounced closed again after him.

So 'Fred' is officially the first man in Northern Ireland to run himself over. Needless to say, there was quite a lot explaining to do when the ambulance arrived. Obviously, names have been changed, partly to protect the guilty, and partly because I can't remember them.

[jimjam]

Exactly the kind of thing Im looking for.

[Tinkerbell]

lecturer "he was part of the RUC"

girl 1 "oh, why? did his car keep breaking down?"

lecturer "what? no i mean throughout the troubles in northern ireland"

girl 1 "why would he need to be part of the RUC if his car wasnt breaking down"

Lecturer "RUC?, meaining The Royal Ulster Constabulary"

Girl 2 "really i thought they called themselves the RAC cos an RAC is part of a car"

[Tinkerbell]

also, my friends aunt, who lives in teh country and is very posh, insists that shouting mint sauce at lambs scares them.

[roverspeed]

Not Irish, but this guy is supremely stupid Jimjam

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8CrxV2GmqQ

this must have really really hurt!